Because NATO’s Oscar season looms, it is time to predict who will win this year’s prizes. Although some stray Holywood D listers now lead the field, it is time for a change of pace, to expand the net to include those whose acting abilities have served NATO better than any such D listers over the last year.
If we do that more inclusive, diverse and LGBT++ approach, then my money is on a short list of Greta Thunberg, Jacinta Ardern and Ukraine’s Clown Prince Zelensky, who continues to have the very best of wars, even as his rump Reich crumbles in front of us all.
Swedish climate change actor Greta Thunberg, seen here giggling like a hyena at Davos 2023, is no stranger to the silver screen, as credits for Scandinavia’s own Shirley Temple stretch all the way back almost to her infancy where she can be seen here and here, starring in Boardwalk Empire, which first aired over a decade ago, long before Greta took the competitive crisis acting industry by storm. Given her lifetime of service to NATO, she deserves her gong.
Not that Greta has given up her Hollywood ambitions. She has most recently starred in a German spoof show, where she can be seen here and here, as she pretends to get arrested by Germany’s notoriously vicious police force.
Given that NATO’s BBC and Daily Mail outlets were so star struck by Greta’s performance that they genuinely thought she was really arrested (before being quickly released), Greta deserves support, particularly as she is being assailed by those NATO’s media heavyweights, who previously never tired of telling us what a vulnerable and adorable little girl Greta was. Shame on them and on the BBC in particular with its own history of sponsoring Al Qaeda’s White Helmets crisis actors, who got their own Oscars when they were NATO’s flavor of the day.
Even if New Zealand autocrat Jacintha Ardern’s popularity has waned, this World Economic Forum starlet deserves our support for the role she played as a caring Kiwi Prime Minister, even as she instituted New Zealand’s most draconian ever laws. Although Ardern is now as popular as an outbreak of the Black Plague, her real crime is that, because she is not sufficiently Sinophobic enough for NATO’s Five Eyes, the CIA had to give her their Gough Whitlam treatment and kick her out of office. Although NATO’s Guardian newspaper praised her acting ability when she starred as New Zealand’s no nonsense boss, Hollywood should also reward her for that role.
As they should New York’s own AOC as she likes to be called to pretend to be hip, Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, who can be seen here pretending to be arrested only a short while after she was accused of protesting against an empty parking lot on behalf of illegal immigrants but really as a photo shoot to boost her own fragil street cred. Although everything alleged anti-war campaigner AOC does is execrable theater, one must remember that this former barista, like all other Democrats who act the radical, are in the pocket of the party’s Nancy Pelosis, who control the purse strings. Although AOC is sometimes allowed to act and even shoot her mouth off on occasion, unless she votes and acts the right way where and when it matters, she will be exited stage left quicker than a paparazzi’s camera flash on a Hollywood catwalk.
Although Ronald Regan and many other actors plied their acting trade in the corridors of power there is, of course, only one actor who could hope to sweep Holywood boards. Although there are no Oscars for guessing who this actor, far and away the world’s richest comedian is, we should first cite some of his greatest roles. Here he is, first of all, playing a piano with his penis. And here is Ukraine’s own Laurence Olivier singing as he prances totally naked about a supermarket with his fellow degenerates. Finally, here is Ukraine’s own Charlie Chaplin, easily history’s most successful ever panhandler, dressed in high heels and tacky BDSM gear, having his bottom pinched and simulating sex with other non-binary freaks.
Although Seán Penn has loaned Zelensky his Oscar, Clown Prince Zelensky no doubt should have one of his own, even if it is only to stop him or his over-dressed wife making one of their inane speeches at the Oscars.
Though the incomparable Shakespeare is right to tell us that “All the world’s a stage,and all the men and women merely players”, who “have their exits and their entrances”, if Hollywood Oscars would exit us of this horrible lot I, for one, would be happy to see them so honoured because, as that same Shakespearean soliloquy finishes, the amount of men, women and children they have collectively helped to dispatch into “mere oblivion; sans teeth, sans eyes, sans taste, sans everything” cry to the heavens for vengeance. So, as they say in show business, let’s hope they break a leg and let’s hope Hollywood and all NATO’s other sponsors, collaborators and crisis actors can be made stop their support for NATO’s endless crimes of cowardice, inhumanity and rapine.
By Declan Hayes